As I have been thinking about this blog I have realized that I am trying to accomplish several things.
The first goal is to have a good list of resources about marriage, separation, and divorce that I have found helpful all in one easy-to-access place. As I share more about our story I want to quickly be able to point people to a sort of one-stop shop for information.
Another goal I have is to continue to sort out a lot of issues for myself in this whole area. I did much of this wrestling privately during our separation to come up with answers for myself then. Now, I am trying to more clearly articulate what I learned so I can more effectively help others. A challenge I now have is how to help and encourage others who are in a struggling marriage or divorce situation that is different from my own.
I want to be able to point people not only to a resource list, but to some of my thinking and sharing my struggles on various issues, as well as more information than just what fits in a list. All of this to say, you may see me switch back and forth on subjects, wrestle with some topics multiple times and from multiple angles. Maybe I will even get some feedback that will be helpful as I sort things out.
I read “Sheet Music” by Kevin Leman. It is a Christian book about sexuality. Early in the book he mentioned that he will probably say something to offend everyone but he begged his readers to hear the big picture of what he was saying and if something totally offended them to tear that page out. That is my desire with this blog. I hope people hear the big picture – that there is tremendous hope for healing marriages even when only one person wants to work on it and there are boatloads of solid resources out there to help. “All things are possible with God” including healing apparently impossible marriages. My wife and I are a living testimony to that.
So if I ramble too much in some post, or if my thoughts aren’t all organized or don’t fit your theology perfectly, please don’t give up on getting help for your marriage or someone’s marriage you know. Keep praying, browsing here, and looking at other places to get the help you need.