Another Stubborn Spouse

I am always encouraged when I hear of a spouse who got stubborn for saving their marriage and in the long run it worked. Here is a story from the Smart Marriages website.

Pastor Hurt is among the 173 who signed the one [CMP] in Clackamas County, Oregon. It’s a county of rugged beauty, much of it tucked up against Oregon’s Cascade Mountains or sprawling across the fertile Willamette Valley. But it’s also a big bedroom community for Oregon’s largest city, Portland. The marriage rate there was going down and the divorce rate was going up when psychologist Steve Stephens put Tom and Liz Dressel together with Mike and Harriet McManus.

Divorce Makes You Less Happy, More Frustrated
The Christian therapist has written a number of books to help makes marriages last – books like “Lost in Translation: How Men and Women Can Understand Each Other” and “20 Rules and Tools For a Great Marriage.”

“God hates divorce. Why does He hate divorce? Because divorce breaks people,” Dr. Stephens told CBN News. “Divorce doesn’t work. It won’t make you happy, I guarantee you – except in very rare situations, a divorce is going to make you less happy, it’s going to make you more frustrated, financially it devastates you.”

Dr. Stephens knew the Dressels were as desperate as he is to fight divorce in Clackamas County. The Dressels were on the verge of divorce themselves back in the 1970s.

Liz went to several secular therapists in attempts to save the flailing marriage. “I went there asking for communication skills, and they kept suggesting I get divorced,” she said.

But Liz says she was a little too ornery to just give up.

“We had three kids to raise and I thought, ‘This man is not getting out of it. Some way we are going to make it through.'”

Eventually, the two found the hope and skills they needed through church and para-church groups.

Tom said, “We took every class, every retreat that had the word marriage in it, and each one was a building-block, a foundation-stone.”

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