"I’ll do anything to save my marriage!" Really?

I so often hear from men who are separated, “I’ll do anything to save my marriage!” Now, I assume that means anything that is not illegal, immoral, or against Scripture.
I am becoming more and more skeptical when I hear someone say this because so often I will then give some suggestions based on my experience, and what they have told me about their situation, but I will only hear from them a couple of more times. Sometimes I will stay engaged with them over time, but very few suggestions that I make, or others with experience in distressed marriages will make, will ever be tried or followed. I usually hear that they settled for a dissolution and are already dating again.
I wish people would just be more honest with themselves and others and say something like: “I really don’t want to lose my marriage, but I am not ready to go all out for it. I will try a few things, but if they don’t work quickly, I am just going to go along with a dissolution and look for someone else.”
Many marriages in dire straits are healed from some awful stuff, but so few couples will latch on to saving theirs with everything they have within them.
Not sure how to inspire people to never, never, never give up.
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2 Responses to "I’ll do anything to save my marriage!" Really?

  1. Michele says:

    I can relate to waffling about staying committed to the oneday reconciliation of my marriage. My divorce has been final now for 8 months and I don’t think my husband has ever doubted his decision or looked back. So I am quietly pursuing God and trying to understand what His will for my life is. I can say that I haven’t felt led either way which has caused me to feel even worse at times. I really just don’t want to be miserable anymore. So I think I need to focus on God and on my own healing as well as understanding my part in the demise of my marriage. Only God knows what is in my future. I’m glad someone knows!

    • Sharon says:

      I so agree with you that you need to focus on God and what He wants for your life. He loves you and cares about every detail. Grow deeper with Him. Seek His face each day. He can still do miracles through our messes. Our friends, Clint and Penny Bragg, were divorced and then reconciled, so we always believe that God can do miracles. We just have to give Him the chance. She didn’t look back either after she divorced Clint. I think you might find their story encouraging at http://www.inverseministries.org.


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