Sometimes during our separation I was just so down in the dumps that it seemed like nothing or no one could encourage me. It was sometimes like that day or night. I learned to put on my headphones and just listen to worship, especially worship that included a lot of scripture.
At times I didn’t have energy to read my Bible, but I would speak out loud The Lord’s Prayer or the 23rd Psalm or other short scriptures that I knew from memory. I can’t tell you how but eventually my spirit would be renewed and I would have hope and be able to think more clearly, read, and reach out to people.
Remember, Jesus promised us that He will never leave us or forsake us. He also told us to “put on the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness”.
I’ve had so many bad days during the course of my 6-month separation and now 2-month divorce that it’s unreal. Some time ago, I was having trouble opening my bible because my wife had gotten it for me as a gift several years ago. The laptop from which I type this comment was given to me by her. So basically I will always have a part of her in my life, whether or not God reconciles us one day.
Not all my days are bad because through the pain, I have comfort in knowing who I am in Christ. And watching praise videos on YouTube has been a help to me (I also listen to and financially support K-LOVE). From here on out, I am on the course to either a miraculous restoration of marriage, or God granting me the grace and peace I need to remain unmarried for life. My position on divorce and remarriage notwithstanding, I could not give my heart to another. Yes, I still have my wedding ring on.