Marriage vs. Parenthood Priority

Jesus said in Matthew 19:4-6, “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

As I listen to people talk about marriage I often get the impression that they see the parent/child relationship as a higher priority and more permanent relationship than  marriage. I especially get this sense when people say things like, “I tried to make my marriage work but it just wasn’t meant to be. I guess because my spouse ________ (fill in the blank with drugs, alcohol, sex, etc. ) but at least I still have my kids.” I often wonder how quick those same people would give up on a child of theirs who had a major life issue such as drugs, or alcohol, or porn addiction, or if they just didn’t like their child.

I often observe parents who will run their schedule or their budget to the max to make sure their children are involved in whatever sports, music lessons, and on and on, and yet when it comes to their spouse they have trouble scheduling a regular date night, or a weekend away, or marriage counseling. There just doesn’t seem to be enough time or money or energy.

We are not one flesh with our children and when they are gone, it is back to husband and wife until death do us part. I have read was that the best thing for the children is for Mom and Dad to love one another and have a strong marriage.

In your opinion, which one is the higher priority and permanent relationship – husband and wife, or parent and child?

What have you experienced that works to keep the priority in balance?

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2 Responses to Marriage vs. Parenthood Priority

  1. Jolene Engle says:

    Amen! Just wrote about the wife who chose motherhood over her marriage today. It’s all too common in our society!

  2. I agree 100%! That is so common to hear–“at least I have my children. They’ll always love me.” Sure our children may need us and love us, but they will fail us too. We will be disappointed by their decisions but our spouse is our flesh! Our relationship with our spouse is sealed by God and the children will grow up and move out one day. We need to remember that lol:)

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