One thing that can be very discouraging as the spouse who wants reconciliation is to get continual messages from their spouse that they have no desire to reconcile. For a quite awhile during our separation that was my situation. Sharon made it clear that she did not want to reconcile. Eventually several things helped.
I became more and more convinced that what the Apostle Paul said about love never failing was true. If I continued to do the loving thing, eventually something good would happen.
I kept looking for more testimonies of hope and I kept finding them, both in person and on the web, in Divorce Care, and many other places. Each testimony of a reconciled marriage gave me new hope for my own. In the book of Revelation 12:11 the Apostle John says, “They overcame him [Satan] by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony…” There truly is something encouraging about testimonies. The more I focused on God the more peace I had.
If you are in such a situation keep seeking help and hope because Jesus says in Matthew 7:8 that “… he who seeks, finds…”. I found that to be true.